When your heart’s calling, answer it!
You’ve heard the key to happiness is to “follow your heart”? It sounds easy enough, but how do you know what your heart really wants? What is your heart’s calling (and even if you find it, how do you answer the call?)
And even more questions…
- What I am here for?
- How can I work out what my heart really wants when my head keeps getting in the way?
- I thought I was following my heart but I’m still not happy.
- I want to follow my heart but it’s just so hard.
- How do I work out who I really am?
Ever found yourself asking these questions?
Sucks, hey? They are just so… persistent!
I get these questions (and more) in my Sacred & Savvy Goddess workshops, so rather than answer you all one by one, I decided to mass-share my 5 ways to find – and answer – your heart’s calling.
Get yourself a chai, your journal and a pen, and get ready to delve within!
1. Have no regrets!
The tragedy of living such long lives is that we tend to put off the “rewards” until later. As in, “I’ll travel the world when the kids are off my hands,” or, “I’ll work part-time once the mortgage is paid,” or, “I’ll become an artist when I’ve done the proper training.”
The beauty of living such long lives is that we have choices – we can travel now while we’re fit and strong (with or without the kids), or we can pay the mortgage off later, or at a slower rate at least. (We can even choose not to have a mortgage!)
In this beautiful post called “Regrets of the Dying“, Bronnie Ware identified common regrets in her palliative care patients. They are:
- I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
- I wish I didn’t work so hard.
- I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
- I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
- I wish that I had let myself be happier.
Johnny Weir, an American figure skater, includes Edith Piaf’s “Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien” (Regrets I Have None) in his Top 10 favourite songs to listen to before competing – there is something poetically beautiful about sweeping away the past, the pains and the pleasures, and “… starting on new bases … because my life, my happiness, today everything begins with you.”
And so… to sweep away the past, the pains, and potential regrets… this is how to find your path of “No Regrets”:
Ask yourself the question, “If I knew I had only three months left to live, how would I spend my time?”
Journal your response now.
Notice how the trivia, the mundane, the worry, the blah… doesn’t even register? None of it appears on your list of what’s important! None of it matters! All of it is fodder for regrets. All of it can go. Get rid of it now. Move on. Focus on the good. The healthy. The happy. The gee-whiz just-do-it crazy good. Yup, just do it.
For it’s the good, the wonderful, and that which makes your heart go thump-thump-thump, that is your heart’s way of saying –
“This is your calling. Now answer the door!”
2. Leave a legacy
I’ve had many careers in my adult life – scientist, quality control officer, Japanese teacher, marketing director, author and now, Marriage Celebrant – and each time I embark on a new adventure I ask,
“Is this how I want my daughter to know me, and to tell her kids what Grandma did?”
The answer in ever-increasing resonance, is yes.
All of my roles have been worthy, and ones that I was proud to pursue. But there is something about being a Marriage Celebrant that I love in particular – it is a noble occupation. To be able to facilitate the legal union between a couple in love is something that makes every cell in my body smile.
And that is how I know I am in alignment with my heart’s calling.
When I hear my daughter tell her classmates that “Mummy marries people,” I can feel myself smiling all over. It is a legacy I am proud of.
This technique doesn’t just apply to career choices. It can apply to the simple things too – what values you pass onto your children, what food and fitness habits you pass on, how you respond to adversity, the name you make for yourself as a community member, the stories that will be told about you when you’re gone…
If your choices and your actions make you smile – if they make you proud knowing that this will become part of your legacy – then you know you have found, and are following, your heart’s calling.
3. Dream on
Dreams are the key to the subconscious. Being open to the clues and the downright BANG-I’M-IN-YOUR-FACE messages in your dreams means you can shortcut your way to answering the question – “How do I find (and follow) my heart’s calling?”
I first discovered this when I was 16, living in a little Japanese village, and struggling day after day with skiing lessons. No matter how many times the instructor showed me how to snow-plough down the greenest of green slopes, I would fall on my butt.
The tears would fall, my friends, oh how they would fall! It was soooooo frustrating not being able to get it right.
But after a week or so of failure upon failure, I had a dream. It was a vivid dream that I was on my skis at the top of a mountain, and I was happy. In my dream I leaned forward on my skis and slid down the mountain with ease. I would lean left, and swish, off I went to the left. I would lean right, and swish, off I went to the right.
It was so easy – and SO FRIGGIN’ FUN! – that I remember waking up laughing.
That afternoon after school, I went back to the slopes. I’m not going to take you step by step through the motions because you can already guess the end of the story – I SKIED.
And I didn’t just ski. I skied beautifully, with poise, with style, with courage, and with the deep-seated knowledge that it is easy (and friggin’ fun!) to ski.
Same thing happened to me last year. I’d been dabbling in creating art as a hobby. Then I dreamt that I was creating beautiful works of art that people were buying!
And that’s what transpired! I am now a semi-professional artist represented by David Giles in Fremantle. I wouldn’t have had the courage to hang my art on a gallery wall had I not seen it clearly in my dreams.
(I say semi-professional because I still create art just for fun, or for no reason at all! It’s OK – if it doesn’t make me smile, I just don’t do it!)
So do try and remember the parts of your dreams that made you feel excited. That maybe hold a clue for what you could be doing if only your head (and/or fear) got out of the way. That find you smiling when you open your eyes.
For it’s these little glimpses that is your heart’s way of saying –
“See this? This is my desire, and your calling!”
4. Follow ze intuition
Oh gosh, I’ve written so much about intuition I don’t even know where to start.
Perhaps with an excerpt from “Listen to Your Inner Goddess“? It has a 5-star rating, which I’m pretty rapt to share…
(Your inner goddess) is the quiet voice of certain knowing.
She intrinsically knows the right choice, even if it’s without rhyme nor reason. She’s the “gut feeling” we talk about; the hunch, the coincidence, the synchronicity, the sense, the instinct that makes us say, “I have a feeling…”
Intuition is a powerful kind of inner wisdom. It’s not necessarily rational or logical, and it’s often no more than a hunch or an instinct.
There are dozens upon dozens of divination tools out there to assist you with understanding your intuitive messages – oracle cards, pendulums, Ouija boards, runes, scrying mirrors, and so on and so on.
It doesn’t matter how you access your intuition, it only matters that you do.
For it’s the subconscious, the depths of our soul, that is in direct communication with our heart. The messages delivered to our conscious via the voice of intuition, is the message of our heart’s desires.
When you hear a whisper that you know to be your truth, a butterfly in your stomach that you know to be a sign, a flutter in your heart that you know is the answer… this is your heart’s way of saying –
“Don’t ignore me. This is your calling! Now answer the call!”
5. Ride the river
Within minutes of “riding the river” you can determine how deeply in alignment you are with your “purpose”.
This is a popular technique I do to help my clients really tune into their bodies and make a massive connection with their heart and soul.
And I mean massive.
The connection is so strong and so undeniable, women often make this their go-to method for measuring how strongly their actions, beliefs and behaviours are in alignment with their heart’s calling.
It is helpful for women who:
- are at a crossroads in their life;
- are on a path but not 100% happy with it;
- feel like they’re in a rut and looking for something new;
- want validation they are on the right track;
- love receiving affirmation that they’re doing it right;
- want to tweak their direction (even if just slightly)
I would share this technique on my blog, but it is too powerful to do it on your own without guidance. So, instead, I set up a webinar facility where dozens of women connected with me, in person, in real-time, and went through the technique with me holding their hand.
Normally my workshops are $150, but because the content of this webinar is so powerful and I really want every woman to absorb it, I’m offering the recording for $0 (or $0.99 for immediate access to the file.)
In just 30 minutes you will have practiced and mastered the “Ride the River” technique. I have taught countless women to do this already, and 100% of them now use this technique for flawless decision-making that they fully trust.
It is fun, and easy. Once you’ve mastered it, it takes less than a minute to connect with your heart, listen to your heart’s desires, and know – at a deep, intuitive, soulful level, and without a doubt – what your next steps should be.
This .mp4 file is a recording of the 30-minute webinar from Wednesday 26 November 2013.
In this session you can hear how I help Alice decide on which University course to choose, how Ruby gets the courage to start her own business, and how Grace makes a life-turning decision to buy a house.
And, you will be coached to "ride the river" to help you too, tap into your intuition and TRUST IT!
Thanks for reading! I welcome your comments below, and any tips on how you find – and follow – your heart’s calling.
Shine on ❤